Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas everyone!  We will be heading to Port Stephen's for Christmas tomorrow for a few days. Port Stephens is 2.5 hours north of Sydney. We will be in back for Boxing Day  and New Years eve in Sydney, which is supposed to be great. I hope everyone had a great Christmas and Happy New Year!

Happy Christmas

The banners around Sydney say Happy Christmas and I will try to be only happy and will definitely not be merry this Christmas after having our apartment broken into.  We live on the bottom level and I was naive to leave the window in the lounge room cracked for fresh air.  While we seeped someone came into our place and took both of our computers, my ipod Emily's bank card, her prised bag, sunglasses, a gift card, my credit card and some new shoe inserts. Yes someone took shoe inserts. So now one week before Christmas we have to deal with this. Someone took their time. They thumbed through Emily's purse, my backpack and my wallet and selected things to take. They then placed my wallet back inside my shorts pocket. They took time to take the computer charger cord for Emily's computer.  Things are not any value to anyone else, the computers are over two years old and likely worthless at a pawn shop. This all happened as we slept. We have a fan running on out room and did not hear a thing. Needless to say this is very disturbing.  We will go away to Port Stephens for Christmas and get away from this gritty, grimy city.  Hopefully our stuff will still be there when we return. 

Bridge Tavern

I have been in Sydney for almost two months now and I have been a bit slow writing about my last night in Nowra in late October.

On the last night of my Nowra experience I got a crash course in Australian bogan culture. Melbournians pride themselves and their city with the abundance of culture. The culture I experienced firsthand in Nowra was the real deal, not a faux city culture. My workmates kept telling me about the “awesome” Thursday nights at the Bridge Tavern. Thursdays at the local watering hole involved topless barmaids serving drinks. I had been to the establishment in question about two weeks previously. The first experience at the Bridge was one to forget, I had been kicked out of the bar after I ignored an middle aged rather portly looking Aboriginal woman who said “hey baby” to me at the same time she was blocking the doorway leaving the men's restroom. I ignored her and within 30 seconds a hand was on my collar and I was escorted outside and greeted by the drunk hoards of locals who were refused entry. I was not drunk when this transpired. I later learned that the door man was mates with the woman and she was obviously looking for some action.

So I did have my reservations about going back inside this same bar and especially at the same time as their busiest night of the week. I arrived alone, expecting to find my workmates inside, they would be easy to find because of their high-viz shirts, or so I thought. Once inside I realized that I never should have went home to shower because everyone in the bar was wearing high-viz tradie garb. I looked around the bar for several minutes before ordering a beer from a non-naked male bartender and settling in and sitting nervously in the corner of the room all by my self. I had a view of the entire place, two pool tables and about a half dozen tall round tables with bar stools on a green carpeted floor. Two women were in stripper attire, topless and g-string bikinis. These girls were the highlight of the bar, the top attraction in town, the beacon of light for many patrons inside, the highlight of their week.

I tried to strike up a conversation with a couple guys playing pool but they were only emitting inaudible noises that only escalated when the girls approached. Their billiard skills were terrible and I was about to leave when I finally saw my workmates entering from the smoking area. I was relived to fine some familiar faces. They were slightly drunk and just had been hanging out in the 'pokies'(video poker room, I guess they tired of the scene quickly too). They challenged me to a game of pool and I obliged. We had an odd number, they sleeked out another player, my workmate Ben had no trouble finding one: The outback dust slid off wide brimmed hat as sand ripples remained. His weatherbeten skin would put an elephant to shame. An eye patch over his left eye partially covered a full facial tattoo, akin to blackbird wings fully outreached. Feathers in his hat were a likely extension of his face. A metal rod on his right leg kept him upright. Covered in rags his bony frame hid his inner pirate.

“G'day, Pirates' the name,” he cracked as I was introduced to my playing partner. "Guess why they call me Pirate? I am missing an eye and have me peg leg!" He revealed his bare eye socket to me and did a small jig on his feet. It turned out that I was facing my workmates, not allies like I expected. Ben added, “you look like you can hold your own in a game of 8 ball, I'm always weary of the quiet ones.” I was ready for this night to be over before the first que was even racked up. My game went terminal, and I missed every shot I took and Pirate and I were easily routed by my two workmates. Pirate was none too pleased and after the end of the game he came over to me and screamed: “I thought all Americans had big balls!” At the same time he reached and groped me with his bony fingers. I felt totally violated, but I remained calm to remind him that that it was an AC/DC song and that they are Australian not American.  

I had my chance to leave again when the topless bar maid made her way to the pool tables and one of my workmates told her all about my pool ablities and how I missed every shot. She turned to me: She was tall and slender with silky tan skin and roubust breasts that were soft and real. She had long dark wavy hair reaching to the middle of her back: her face was pleasant until she opened her mouth and revealed crooked yellow teeth and said in a very nasal Australian accent: “Wow you suck!”

She collected all of her tips from the pool players and moved on. In the middle of all the commotion I saw a very confused older gentleman with the name tag wondering around looking lost. He came from the other room and was a part of a group party. Barry was his name according to the white sticker, his face was even paler as he struggled to find the restroom.  I peered into the door he ventured from and it revealed a family restaurant in the very next room! I was wondering why so many normal looking people were walking through the bar to the restroom and back, then disappearing again. I followed Barry inside the restaurant and looked around and was about to order some fish and chips when a familiar voice cried out: “Joe!” It was one of my roommates' girlfriend. She was leaving Nowra just like me and she was hosting her going away party that same night. She was with a group of friends and it was much more comfortable to hang out with this group. She was going to attend flight attendant school starting the next week in Sydney. I was told that the food at the Bridge Tavern was some of the best in town so people just figured that boobs and beef just go together well on a family Thursday night in Nowra.

I had to walk back through the bar to use the restroom and was trying not to let the door hit me on the way out when I was accosted by a man who was peddling porno dvd's. Later I learned that he sponsored the entire event every week and his company is known as Blue Rocket. I told him that I was not interested in his blue penis pills or sticky dvd's and went on my way. Everyone I met before Australia told me that Melbourne was the mecca of culture when I found real Australian culture in the middle of nowhere. The guidebooks have it wrong. Off the beaten path lies some of the weirdest places that many travelers never see.

Sydney Adventures

Emily and I have been in Sydney for about a month now. We have been living in Stanmore, Wollstonecraft, and now Elizabeth Bay. We started in Stanmore, an inner west suburb for our first three weeks in a very small city apartment . From Stanmore we had a front row view to the approach of Sydney's airport. Resting on my pillow my pillow, I could see the logos on the underside of the wings on the plains as they buzzed our roof: Qantas, Jetstar, Tiger Airways, et el.  From 6am to 11pm we had constant aircraft noise, making conservation with another person in the same room sometimes impossible.  When we were not having problems communicating with humans we were communicating with the spiders to go away! We had two large Hunstman spiders visit our kitchen, one resting on the soy sauce at the same time we needed that bottle of sodium for our sushi, sending Emily across the room like a Samurai on full inverse banzai. The Stanmore apartment was super tiny and we never really unpacked our bags. The car was always full of stuff and we were constantly worried about  getting a ticket in  the two hour parking on the street we were staying on. We did not have a resident's parking permit (that's another story!)

 Last week we stayed in Wollstonecraft, near North Sydney. It was an amazingly clean house with heaps of space on a quiet street. The back of the house had a balcony overlooking bush like setting of a public park. Birds were chirping and no parking hassles. We agreed to stay one week because we put money down for a apartment in Elizabeth Bay and just needed a place to crash. We were relaxing, watching the sunset on our first night when we met one of our flatmates.  He was middle aged and turned out to be really creepy. We were expecting privacy and all this guy wanted to do was pepper Emily with questions and act like I was not even there. Things got worse later in the week when the landlady informed us that we needed to leave the room by Friday at noon, which was a real problem because we both worked all day.  We were moving into our Liz Bay place Saturday which left us nowhere to live Friday night.

We ended up staying at Emily's friend's house in Newtown which turned out to be an epic disaster. It turned out to be a party house and we had to wait for everyone to drink and go out before we could claim the broken futons in the lounge room we were expecting to sleep on. After wiping potato chip crumbs off the cushions we discovered that overnight road works were underway, including someone using a concrete saw right under the lounge window for several hours. I worked early that Saturday and Emily was woken up by the flatmates cooking vodka omelets at 8 am. We finally moved into out own apartment in Elizabeth Bay last Saturday afternoon.. We enjoy the place, it's a little old, but in a central location, only two stops from the CBD, and has a nice park nearby. Parking is a problem which is no surprise but we were really shocked to discover a mold farm growing behind the entertainment center requiring several hours of cleaning. We have been through a lot the past month, moistly struggling to find a place to live and securing full time work. We have signed a sub-lease until January 29th and this place should give us a good base for more Sydney adventures.

Why I Enjoy Traveling

I have recently moved to Sydney from Nowra after two months. Being in Sydney reminds me that I am instill in a foreign country. Nowra was eerily similar to living in small town Nebraska. Its good to know that where I came from is no different than other places on the other side of the world, There is nothing wrong with that. When traveling in a condensed period of time people make decisions that could last a lifetime. When traveling over a long period of time each decision I make feel like an earth shattering decision, knowing that I have only so much time before my work visa runs out. My last night in Nowra I was asked if traveling helps self confidence, and I was not sure how to answer. After several days of thinking about this I have come to the conclusion that I now fell less self confident because I now realize that where I am from is not all that cool and the I don't really feel any more special than any other guy next to me.

Recently my girlfriend and I, who I met in New Zealand decided to give ourselves another chance. Her name is Emily and she is from South Carolina. We met over a year ago and it seems like everywhere we turn we have similarities. When we met in New Zealand she was just starting her working holiday, at the same time I was just finishing up. I recently talked to a guy who told me that when traveling as a couple it seems like 10 years of a relationship is compressed into 10 days. I can totally relate to that. We have relocated to Sydney together and we are both looking for full time work. Emily does promotions for a living and I am doing the construction thing again. She always finds employment easily. We both admit that we would have never met each other if we were not traveling. She is my first long term girlfriend and I made a litany of mistakes he first time around that I have now corrected. Everyone has their reasons to travel. I have never really been sure of my reasons, but I am very sure that I would be very happy to travel with Emily anytime.

Footy, Football, Rugby and Gridiron.

This past weekend I watched the final 20 minutes of the Wallabies-All Blacks rugby game at a local bar. I was talking to a couple of guys from Sydney who were in town for a mountain biking trip. I asked them if this was a big game and they seemed to think so. The game being played was for the Bledsoe Cup, an annual competition between the national Rugby Union teams of Australia and NZ. I was later told that State of origin rugby league game would actually be larger in scale. What the heck is state of origin??

Sports in Australia are very regional and much different from New Zealand. The national sport in NZ is rugby, technically known as rugby union. Rugby union is most likely the sport Americans can identify as “Rugby.” Each Team fields 15 Players and the game is full of rucks and scrums. The front line players are large burly dudes that resemble NFL offensive lines. Many players are missing their front teeth. The game has a slower pase and each team can hold the ball for an unlimited amount of time, but a fair number of changes in possession take place because of game strategy. The other form or rugby played is rugby league, known as 'Football.' A rugby league team fields 13 players on each side and the teams have to kick the ball to the other side after five tackles, very similar to the 4^th down punt in American football. The same sized ball and is used for both union and league. The goalposts for each game are are the same and look about the same as American football's goal posts. Rugby league is likely the most popular sport nationwide. Historically football(league) is played by professionals and rugby(union) is amateur. According to Victorians, the oldest football code in the word, written in 1859 is Australian Football, or 'footy.' Footy teams have 18 players on each side. I have absolutely no clue what the rules are in the game except the ball can be bounced on the grass as the player runs down field. Players are running, jumping and kicking all over the place, think of basketball on grass. American football does have a solid following in Australia as well, but is known not as football but as 'gridiron.' I have a workmate who claims to be a Cincinnati Bengals fan and I have no idea why. He says that his football(rugby league) team he supports are called the West Tigers and have the same colors as the Bengals. That is as good as any reason I suppose. It is very confusing to keep everything straight.

When I arrived in Melbourne I snuck into an Aussie Rules game between the Sydney Swans and Essendon Bombers. I was totally clueless to what was going on. I did know that Essendon was loosing badly to the point that many of the local supporters were leaving the stadium before halftime. (Essendon is a suburb of Melbourne) I took a seat in one of the upper decks of Etihad Stadium so I could have a good view of the field. The layout of the playing grid was an oval with four posts at either end. Two of the posts in the middle are taller than the two outer posts. I later learned that the aim of the game is to kick the ball in the opposing teams taller goal posts. If the player misses, and hits the ball inside the outer posts, then he is awarded one point, essentially a small reward for missing the inner posts. The game I attended was entertaining to the finish with Essendon attempting a comeback and loosing by four points. At the conclusion, all of the Sydney supporters in the lower bowl waved their rend and white striped flags and sang the Notre Dame Fighting Irish victory march, yes the same Notre Dame “cheer, cheer for old Notre Dame” fight song rhythm! They totally stole the Indiana's school song! Or did they?...after all Australian footy predates the first American Football game between Rutgers and Princeton by ten years.

The next week I snuck into the Wallabies-Wales Rugby Union game at the same stadium. The mood was somber. The colosseum was only half as full as it was for the footy game only one week earlier. Rugby union is a much slower game and the action only comes in bursts. Its most likely the most similar to American football. I had plenty of room for my legs to stretch as I watched the Wallabies trade kicks with the Welsh and win by one point. I would say with conviction that the Welsh supporters were much more vocal than the locals. I can only assume that there are many Welsh expats living in Australia, and I'm sure a few die hard fans made the trip the the three game series. Security was much more present during the Wallibies game, I had to find a used ticket to get inside as opposed to the previous week when I walked right in without being checked.

Melbourne is home to the AFL or Australian Football league. 9 of the 18 teams in the AFL are based in Melbourne which should make no surprise that the former name of the league is the Victorian Football League. The NRL or National Rugby League is rugby played by rugby league rules. NRL is more popular in New South Wales and Queensland and the AFL rules the roost in Victoria. Super Rugby is the professional version of rugby union with teams in Australia, NZ and South Africa, but I have yet to find an Aussie who could even name a team. One of the post popular games of the year is the football 'State of Origin' State of Origin is when NRL players get divided up into teams representing their home states, not their professional teams. The matches are held once a year and are the hottest tickets in town. The competition is between Queensland and New South Wales. Victoria and the other states never stand a chance, they don't even field a team. Queensland has won for the past 7 years over NSW, making for some grumpy Sydneyers.

When I moved to Nowra in NSW it became very apparent that football(league) is referred to as 'footy' here and footy(AFL) is known as Gay F L. My workmates told me that any sport with a team named after a Swan must not be taken seriously. They said that AFL players are afraid to get hit and are a bunch of sissys. Because I live in NSW I did not ask them about the opinion of the current state of origin series, which may make them more upset. Australian football at large is still not as confusing to me as it is when I try to explain gridiron(American football) to my workmates. They just think that anyone wearing an American jersey is part of a gang or something like that. I try very hard to explain all the strategy involved in the game and they just shake their heads, and try to convince me that any Australian football is much more hardcore and tougher, even the so called gay F L. They reason that because only what they have seen on tv or you tube. Which I guess is a fair assessment. I then showed my workmates videos of Terry Tate office linebacker and they were very quiet for several days.

All this is getting very confusing for me, especially when I want to watch gridiron(NFL) and I have to get up at 4am on a Monday to do just that. I guess the world is really upside down down under. The game(rugby union) this past weekend was a tie between the All Blacks and Wallibies, which must have a national day of mourning in NZ but was in the back page of the papers here. In the front page: speculation on next year's state or origin rosters.

Two Years Overseas

Today marks the day I have been away from the USA for two years.  I don't really feel that far from home where I am currently living. Nowra is a small town and It feels just like home, which is not why I decided to leave and travel! I have decided I will leave and move to Sydney in two weeks. I want to get into working on boats again and there should be plenty of opportunity to do that. I am a bit homesick, mostly I miss watching football, but one of my workmates recorded the Nebraska-Wisconsin game on DVD, which was really nice of him. Its much easier to watch games in Australia than NZ because regular ESPN is available here with cable packages. I hope Sydney will provide me with more things to do, especially things that I cannot do at home.

Hipstroy

Last week was a holiday weekend and I traveled back to Melbourne to visit friends.  I have spent the past 6 weeks living in Nowra and needed to get out of town.  When I lived in Melbourne I lived in Fitzroy. It seemed like one of the cool neighbourhoods that everyone talked about at the hostels when I arrived. I was lucky to find a sublease when I did. The house I stayed in most likely dated from the 1860's and was not very modern. The front of the house was two bedrooms and the rear was a stable, which now is another bedroom and lounge. The kitchen and bath are added on and I had to walk around the old stable to take a shower in the crisp mornings. I was reminded that I was paying steep rent because of the location and because Fitzroy was such a “hip” neighbourhood that the lifestyle would pay for its self. The location was cool. I was a 10 minute walk to parliament train station, and tram lines ran on the main streets on either side of my place. There were many bars and restaurants within a few minutes walk. Also very close by was 2 large public housing blocks. Apparently 20 years ago Fitzroy was very blighted and store front rents were very affordable for artists to set up their studios.

As with many places where hippies and arties take up residence, real estate prices creep up as well over the period of several years. This was no exception for Fitzroy. The people who called this enclave home were mostly hipsters or rockabilly or something in between. Is hipster style the same across continents,? I am from Nebraska and have no idea! Girls always wore skirts, but had some sort of crazy designer leggings. Guys would roll up their pants so their upper ankles would be showing or tuck their trousers into their boots. Girls sometimes had hair dyed two colours, half blonde/ half pink, sometimes vertically, sometimes horizontally. Work boots were deemed to be cool and the dirtier looking the clothing the more in vogue you were. I was lucky I finally fit in somewhere when I walked home from my construction jobs covered in mud in grubby clothes. The 1950's are back with regards to men's haircuts. A lot of guys would have their hair slicked back behind the ears like John Travolta in Grease. Another style is the t-shirt with rolled up sleeves. There was a rockbilly dance club on Smith street where swing music was the norm.

I had major issues with weird people in general. Hobos from the public building projects run rampant on the streets. When I wait for the tram on any given day I'm asked for my spare change at least once. It could be a big city thing, but I don't remember anywhere I have lived that had some many mental cases. I had many experiences at the local McDonald’s(another story) with these people. On the day I moved out my flat mate and I ate a burger for lunch at Huxtaburger, a Smith Street staple. We sat outside on the pavement and within in 20 minutes we were pestered by hobos asking for spare change. This happened right in front of the restaurant in outdoor seating separated from pedestrian traffic! The second dude asked at the exact time our food was brought to us and the staff did nothing!

 I know Melbounians are very proud of their city, but I’m sure that these things I have brought up are no strangers to other cites of comparable size. It was impossible for a single guy to find a cab at night because of the rash of mugging and murders. The entire time it seemed like the whole city was seedy and crime ridden, and all of this before this awful crime happened. I have come to the conclusion that Melbourne is definitely not the world's most livable city, unless you enjoy strange haircuts, crime, grime and  doin time.

Now in Nowra

I have been in Nowra for 10 days now. I have worked for nine of those days. When I'm not working I am sleeping. I was so tired on the overnight bus here that I must have lost my book and I am guessing my computer charger fell out of my bag as well.  I just got my new charger in the mail today and I am back online.

 Nowra is a growing town and and it seems larger than the 35,000 population reported. Its takes 15 minutes to drive to work from where I am living. Every house had a large yard and most houses are only one story, spreading things out even more. I am staying in North Nowra, its very quiet with a bush walk along the Shoalhaven river very close by. The downtown itself is busy during the day but the streets clear off very fast after 5pm. The local train station is the terminus of the southern Sydney metro network, making it easy to get to the city, but its still a three hour train ride. Nowra is an Aboriginal word meaning black cockatoo. The local joke is don't look up or you will get pooped on, or something like that. I will undoubtedly learn more as time passes but now I have to sleep, I go back to work again in what seems like just a few hours!

Leaving Melbourne

I will be taking a bus to Nowra, New South Wales tonight. I have a job at Pacific Furniture that I start on Monday. Nowra is a small town of about 30,000, two hours south of Sydney. I have no idea what I'm getting into. I also have no idea where I will be sleeping Monday night!  There are no hostels or couchsurfers there, maybe I will have to go to the pub and find some random people to take me in.

Australian Builder's Slang

Ute: Pickup Truck

Arvo: Afternoon

Timbers: Lumber

Chippy: Carpenter

Sparky: Electrician

Brickie: Bricklayer

Subbie: Sub Contractor

Bat: Stop/Slow Traffic Sign

Witches Hat: Traffic Cone

 Bikkie: Biscuit or any snack

Smoko: Smoke/coffee break

Bin/Skiff: Massive dumpster

Dunny/Port-a-loo: Chemical Toilet

PPE: Personal Protective Equipment

Absolutely Rooted: Very Tired
 
Joey Boy: yours truly, labour hire.

What Could Have Been...

As I was riding home last night on the train, on my way home from work, I was covered in mud and had many dirty looks from people who specifically avoided me. The train got so crowded at Flinders Street station that people had no choice but to sit next to me.  I apologized about my appearance to the 3 people around me and I struck up a conversation with one guy in in suit across from me. He inquired on my appearance and I told him that I was working construction and was playing in the mud all day. He asked me if I was looking for a job, but I was reserved in my response.  I told him a little more about my self and he told me that he was familiar with the US and has a ex-girlfriend in Milwaukee.  He also said he worked in finance. He said his name was Dave and he was going to give me his business card but he did not find any before the train arrived at my station.  I wished him well, shook his hand and got off the train. After about 10 minutes I remembered that I have several resumes in my bag. Oh well, I had no idea what kind of job he was talking about and If I would even like it.

Random Thoughts on Melbourne

Its the ending of my second month in Australia's second largest city. I have realised that I am far from home but not really that far at all. I am finding people in Melbourne not rude, but arrogant. The foreman’s that I have worked for are what I may call ”colonial” in their attitudes. People here are very proud of their city and culture and are not afraid to flaunt it. So many guys wear scarves even though I think they are entirely not practical at all. Scarves look pleasant on women, but c'mon guys its just too metro. On the weekends every man woman and child wears striped scarves in the colours of the football team they are supporting. That's Aussie rules football, which rules the sporting roost in Victoria. Everyone asks me If I have been to a game yet, which I have, and asks me if I like being apart of the crowd. I have to tell them that its nothing like football Saturdays in Nebraska.

Melbourne is full of weird people dressed up and down all over the place.  Super skinny jeans, pointed shoes.  A common hipster haircut I see is the half shaved head/other half bleached. Other people are begging for change everywhere I seem to go, including most internet hotspots. Two people came up to me when I was ordering at McDonald's to ask for my change so they could eat!  Why these hobos were not evicted out of the restaurant is beyond me.  The reason I have to use public networks is because my house is apparently too old for DSL. I have been living in Fitzroy, one of the oldest Melbourne inner city suburbs, and my new flatmates tell me that we cannot get cable TV or internet because there are not enough spots on some sort of junction board or something along those lines.  Without internet we do enjoy the view of the Telstra Communications skyscraper from our front door.

Fitzroy is a very old neighbourhood with most houses dating from the 1870's. Our house was once most likely two rooms with a stable in the rear. The stable now is a bedroom and a lounge room. Every morning I have to walk outside the stable to the back of the house to access the kitchen, shower and bathroom. Its has not been warm in the mornings with lows hovering just above freezing, a fantastic way to start the mornings. The neighbourhood is known for its cafes and bars but every place looks super grungy.  Graffiti is all over Melbourne and Fitzroy is no exception.  The bars have nice clientele, but the expatiation is that customers are paying for the grimy feel of the place by charging $8 and $9 for a pint of the cheapest beer.  The only night I go out is Wednesday when my flatmate and I go to pub quiz down the street in some establishment called Sentido Funf.(bad misspelled mutual fund names included in the price of drinks.)  Part of the enjoyment of this night is the $10 Parma specials.  Parma is apparently a Melbourne staple which I can only describe as a chicken fried steak covered in parmesan cheese. This fried delight fills me up like the all you can eat at Sapp Brothers truck stop.  My flatmate tries to tell me that its an Australian variation of German schnitzel, but I'm not buying it, its totally trucker food.

Melbourne people really think that the city's coffee, cafe, restaurant and bar culture is the real deal. I don't drink coffee very often and rarely eat out so the jury is still out on that one. I'm a bit disappointed by the cityscape, its vary flat, a stark contrast to Auckland's steep hills surrounding the harbour dotted with sail boats. I think the city reminds me of Chicago because of the old buildings and the extreme urban sprawl that permeates every direction from the CBD. The inner city suburbs look eerily similar with bars on every corner. I recently struck up a conversation with a guy on a train who is a Dutch actor. He said he has toured the entire US and has even done shows in Omaha. He said Melbourne reminds him of Portland or Minneapolis, not Chicago. I still think its like Chicago.

Its very crowded in the city and hard to get on the trams during rush hour. I would rather walk 45 minuted home from the train station instead of spend $3.30 to let someone smell my armpits in a cramped space for 20 minutes as I try not to sway into old ladies as the tram shakes and jerks around corners. My flatmate said she saw some guy covered in blood in the tram last week, the same night someone trued to break into the back of our house. Such is life in a so called big city.

I'm slowly getting into things here. It helps getting to know a few people, but I'm not truly feeling the vibe. I'm told that things will get better because its the middle of winter and there are not as many festivals and activities, so I will have to be patient. I am only subleasing my place for 2 more weeks and I need to move again. This may be a good time to look at other cities, such as Sydney or Adelaide. Sydney is huge, but Adelaide is rated as Australia's most liveable city. I have been living in the so called “world's most liveable city” but its still a struggle to get my clothes dry with no dryer.

Melbourne does have very good public transport and is a very diverse city. I do miss doing stuff outside and would like to get into sailing again.  The city feels more "American" than New Zealand with the fast pace of life and more commercial feel of everything.  NZ was just quirky.  I have not given up yet, and I'm sure with more time any city I establish myself in will be come the most liveable city for me.

City Living

The past three weeks has found me living in an apartment the size of a shoebox. I live with 3 other people, a couple from Chile and a guy from Singapore. I share a room with the Singaporean.  It is the same price per week that I was paying at the hostel in my last blog post. I thought 2 people in a room was an upgrade from 10.  The place is incredibly small as you can see from the photos.  I was initially excited to move into a city flat, at least expecting some nice views above street level, but of course I get stuck on the first floor. My view is that of the car parking sign directly to the left of out tiny 2' patio. I am one block from Melbourne's Chinatown, and according to the tourist map, my street is the Greek precinct, but it looks like Chinatown too. There is a nightclub down the block and the lines of revelers waiting to get inside wrap down the sidewalk under our patio on weekend nights. Its not common to hear people yelling and scuffling around 3am.  I seldom speak with my flatmates and I recently found out that the couple from Chile are actually brother and sister and I took the place of her husband during the sublease. Oh well, I don't even want to know.  The Singaporean is nice but he is a gamer and stays up all night and sleeps all day, forcing me to attempt to be quiet during the daylight hours. I'm leaving this week for a new place in the hipster capital of Fitzroy.

I have never lived in a city this big before. Melbourne has 4 millions residents, and according the The Economist, is the most livable city in the world.  I have not seen sustainable livability yet. I pay $165 a WEEK for a shared room, I remember paying $240 a MONTH in Nebraska back in 2009!  The construction industry has found me again, and I work on average four days a week and I commute by train usually leaving my place before 6am. When I get off work around 4, the trains are very crowded and people avoid me because I am usually extremely dirty.  I go against the flow of foot traffic during my commute.  The train depot closest to my place is Parliament station. I usually elbow my way up the steps against the stream of suits taking trains out of the CBD, looking very out of place in my grubby construction garb. I have received a few dirty looks on the train after I get up to exit and clumps of dirt remain on the seat I just vacated.


After I move to my new place I hope to be more settled. I hope my job gives me more hours and I will quite possibly look for a second job after my birthday in two weeks.  Its strange to have my second birthday in a row in cold weather. It's nice to have the change of seasons, but I really hate cold!

Nomads

I have spent the past two weeks nomading at this seedy hostel on Spencer street.  Nomads is a chain of hostels across Australasia. I booked the cheapest hostel in the city and I was not expecting 5 star service but I should have known better.  I was booked in a room with 12 people for my first week, then upgraded to a room with 10 people this week.  On the second morning at my residence, I was woken up by a very drunk Canadian girl at 7am.  She thought it would be a good idea to try to climb into my bed.  I was worried that she would vomit into my precious neck pillow, but all thoughts of this were dashed when her friend finished packing and had to leave the room. She also told me that she does not like American guys.  I guess she was not as bold without her mate.

The windows of the room were very drafty and the light always shone through, making sleep very unsatisfactory. I was relieved to move to a new room on the next lever that had a long corridor where I could store my stuff.  It was a quiet room until I arrived after dinner to only be queried by three people in the room if it was ok to smoke weed, as long as the window was open. The question presented to me was not nearly as bad as the smell permeating from the bedraggled laundry strewn across the room.

Not all the people were dodgy as there were two kiwi guys staying in the room and I got along with them well right away.  One guy was middle aged farmer from the south island who always wore a black jumpsuit and the other a Maori bloke from south Auckland looking for work.  They have only been in the room for a few nights and got me up to speed on what was happening.  There was a French girl, probably 20, was living in the room for three weeks previous.  They speculated that she was working at one of the three strip clubs that were only a block away.  They also told me that she told them that some Indian dude owed her $300, but we could only speculate for what.  There was also a strange Aussie guy there who looked like a vampire with prison tats.  On the window sill was a bag of garlic, so we did not know what to take from that.  The first night included the Aussie guy getting so high he fell asleep on the floor at 8pm, only to wake up at 4 am and rouse the entire room, screaming "Where is my Fucking lighter!" He then went up to the French girl and not so politely asked her to cook him some eggs.

Things got exponentially sophisticated this past weekend.  A group of Brazilians who were studying in Brisbane came to Melbourne to party for the weekend.  Like most Latinos, their idea of going out is drinking at the hostel until 2am, then heading to the nightclubs until 8am.  The Maori guy got almost got into a fistfight with them the first night and things only became more dreadful.  At 5am of their second night I was woken up by the guy above me who was trying to climb out of his bed.  He fell on the floor with a intense thud, then walked in front of the French girl's bed and began to urinate.  I yelled at him and woke up the rest of the room.  That did not stop this young Casanova from peeing all over the French girl's clothes and her computer.  I turned on the light to reveal that he also peed on her bed and she was not alone.  A random German guy got wet as well. The German woke up suddenly and ran out of the room butt naked screaming in his native tongue and covering himself with his hands.  The young Brazilian who did the deed then jumped back into MY bed, forcing the Maori guy and myself to pick him up and throw him back into the top bunk.  The other Brazilians nearly fell out of their beds laughing.  The French girl was too stoned to wake up.  She slept into 10am and when she rose had the nerve to ask why the entire room spelled like ass.  That's when I had a good laugh.  I  did loan her a few dollars to help her with her laundry later in the day because she had so much to clean.  At least this place has free rice and pasta.

Tonight is ladies night at the hostel bar. Many guys are wearing u guessed it: dresses and wigs to collect two hours of free drinks. The Aussie guy is wearing a tight striped  French shirt and a g-string, standing at the end of the bar wearing sunglasses looking over his next prey.

On Thursday I will start subletting a place until July 22, so these adventures will also be short lived.  I will also be arising at 6am to make it to work in time. Just another hassle of starting over in a new city.

Melburrr!

I Arrived in Melbourne yesterday and I was in for quite a surprise. It was a very crispy 10 degrees Celsius. My first impression of the city is that it has a gritty urban feel to it. My hostel in on a busy corner on the edge of the CBD. The drafty windows of my room don't have curtains and a tram go by on the street below every few minutes. The metro bridge is also on the opposite street corner and one of those go past every few minutes too. Think of Elwood Blues' apartment with the walls shaking and the lights flickering.

I went to an ALDI supermarket and I was welcomed by the very cheap prices of everything. I was relieved to find bag of oatmeal for only $1. When I was in line the guy behind me kept pushing my butt with his cart, which contained about a dozen 2L sodas. He was short, around 50 years old and was whispering under his breath. There was only one checkout open so I had no options. He wanted me to move closer to the register, but 2 people were in front of me! I told him to lay off, but he just shrugged and said “damn yanks.” Once I was at the register, the attendant was just as rude, not looking up at me, he expected me to bag my own groceries the same time he slid them across the scanner, even sliding my oatmeal onto the floor. This is by far the worst service I have ever seen anywhere. I guess that is just par for the course at the south Melbourne ALDI.

I started sending out resumes this morning, but I am finding out that Australia highly regulates everything. To have a temp construction job, I have to complete a white card, which costs $60. Because there is such a backlog of cards being processes it may take a few weeks!! Last week in NZ was a holiday weekend, celebrating the Queens birthday. I came here expecting the same thing, but this weekend Australia celebrates the same friggin holiday!! So now I won't hear back from any employers until at least Tuesday. Queen Elizabeth was born on April 21 so I'm not sure why both country’s celebrate the occasion on separate weekends, Kiwis and Aussies just agree to disagree. At least the long weekend will let me have time to explore the city and markets more. I ate lunch at the fantastic south Melbourne market, and Queen Victoria market is reportedly much larger. It feels so strange to be out of New Zealand, I feel like I left something behind. Maybe I just became too comfortable after being at the same place for 20 months. Its time for a new challenge.

What I love about NZ

Kumera

Speights Beer

Polymer money

Taking a ferry to work

People from all over the world living here

Amazing ocean views everywhere you look

Staying off the internet with expensive MB per use cost

Never more than 4 hours away from a beach, anywhere in the country

Not spending money because every store closes shortly after I get off work

ACC medical accident coverage for anyone in the country, including tourists

Surprisingly good music like Brooke Frazier and Avalanche City

1.5 times regular wage for any day working on a public holiday

Free TV not censoring movies or HBO shows

Being one day ahead of the rest of the world

Everyone has a boat or a mate with a boat

8% holiday pay added to each paycheck

Mince and cheese pies

$5 sushi boxes

Wheet-Bix

Sweet As

What I hate about NZ

Steinlager Beer

Air drying clothes

Sonny Bill Williams

Every store closed by 6 pm

Paying for internet by MB use

Short daylight during the winter

Sinks that have separate taps for cold and hot

Incredible price of simple things like groceries
 

Censored news coverage that would hurt tourism

Bathroom sinks that are so small I can't fit my hands under the tap

Flattening of vowels, pronouncing words like Mentos Men-taas, or Aidas, ahh-d-daas

Conserving water because many homes rely on rainwater collection

Everyone uses a dish brush for dishes, and no one seems to rinse

Radio stations playing the same Kiwi songs over and over.

Ketchup is called tomato sauce and it tastes very funny

Guys who think they have cool cars, but it only has a V6

Bad NZ reality TV shows like the GC

Warrant of fitness inspection for cars

Newspapers that read like tabloids

Only 3 grocery store chains

Jean shorts

Netball

Mullets

Tongan Time

I arrived in the Kingdom of Tonga this morning.  I will be here for two weeks.  My plan is to take a ferry to one of the outer islands tomorrow, maybe the Vava'u group.  I am on a extreme budget so my last week I maybe held up in the hostel.  Its hot and muggy here, with internment rain showers.  I did bring my dive gear, so I defiantly want to get some diving in.  Hope everyone is enjoying winter back home, my shirt is very vicid on my sweaty back.

Let's go for a smoke

I have been working at the Onetangi Shell service station for several months. We sell cigarettes behind the counter and I have to know all of the brands the customers want. I have never smoked in my life and never want to. Many customers ask me what cigarette or loose tobacco they should choose and I cannot give them a fair answer, knowing that I must make a sale to support my wages. Many people want to know what the difference between Paul Mall Baseline and Pall Mall Regular. “Which is better the Red, Blue or Green package?” “Benson and Hedges and Dunhill are the same price. What is the better one?” What are you cheapest tailies?”These are some of the questions posted to me about the quality of tobacco. (Tailies are slang for pre-made cigarettes, not loose tobacco, another popular option.) Maybe Shell could buy a pack of cigarettes for the staff to try to taste test. After all an informed salesperson is a good salesperson. I have tried almost every type of candy in the store, why not branch into smokes?? Many of the regulars expect me to know exactly what pack they like, and get easily offended if I get the wrong pack like Holiday Reds instead of Horizon Reds.

This is what I have learned about tobacco: The Red packages are the regular of stronger flavor. The blue packages are mild and the green packages are menthol. The packs come in 20s 25s and 30s. There is also loose tobacco available with papers and filters separate. The cheapest package is John Player Special, or JPS. The cost is NZ$14.10, yes over $14 for a pack of smokes. I get many inquires about these late in the evening when many cantankerous figures visit the store. (There is also a liquor store next door, but that’s another blog post) Next up is Paul Mall Baseline. These run about $14.35. Next up are Holidays, around $15. The Dunhill and Benson and Hedges are next up at $16.60 a pack for 20. The more expensive packs have 25 or 30. The most expensive is Dunhill Blue or Reds at $22.40 a pack for 25. B&H 25 are runner up at $22.20. I only make $13 an hour and most people on Waiheke do not make a lot of money so Cigarettes are a major expense for users.

The best part of selling cigarettes is the pictures on the packs. Cigarettes in New Zealand must have a huge picture that is supposed to discourage their use. Examples include a bleeding brain, infant on a respirator, strange blind eyeball, ect. The purpose of these pictures is to be a deterrent from smoking bit the opposite appears to be the affect. People often want a certain picture on their pack. For example one woman does not like the smoking leads to impotence label which features a cigarette bent over like a limp penis. She prefers the one with a bleeding brain, she claims that it is example of the brain drain on Waiheke during the winter. Some people are so desperate for smokes that they pay half of the pack with small coins and try to pay the rest on their visa card, only to see it declined. This is my fault that the card is declined of course, so I bear the brunt of verbal punishment from the disgruntled customer. I should not be harsh on the cigarette users, after all we make a lot of money selling them and if it was not for the sin bins of gasoline and cigarettes I would be without a job, having to pay for chocolates with small coins and getting upset when my visa card declines.

Onetangi Beach

Onetangi Beach is a wonderful neighborhood on the isolated end of Waiheke Island.  I have been living here for several weeks now.  I stay incredibly busy with to jobs.  One is at the Shell station about 300 meters from the beach.  My other job is painting a $3 million house 25 minutes walk from the gas station.  The owner is very nice and he is always adding jobs to be done.  So far I have oiled the ceder walls and stained the deck.  I have also helped with the construction of a trail leading down to the beach.  The house is on a very steep incline and a rocky beach is about 100m down from the house. 

The Shell station has offered to extend my visa for 2 more years if I choose.  I have yet to decide if I want to do this, but I really want to stay for the entire Kiwi summer.  My original plan was to travel to Tonga for a holiday before I look for work in Australia, where I have a work visa approved.  I feel very comfortable here, but I will need to decide very quickly.